Tinder Profile: The Kurgan

The Kurgan

Verified • 16th Century Russia
• Lives in a Dark Alley
• Straight Man
• Less than a mile away (and closing fast)

About Me
I have been through the ages. I have seen your civilizations rise and fall, and I am still here. I am not looking for "long walks on the beach" unless that beach is strewn with the wreckage of my enemies. 

I am a man of simple tastes: large broadswords, fast cars, and the absolute destruction of anyone who claims to be my equal. If you are looking for a "sensitive soul," swipe left. If you want the strongest warrior in the tri-state area—a man who can survive a lightning strike to the chest and keep his head—you have found him.

Must Be Comfortable With:
- Frequent, high-speed relocation.
- Stays in questionable motels.
- My complete lack of interest in your "career goals."
- The occasional decapitation of my rivals.

My Favorite Quotes
> "I have something to say! It's better to burn out than to fade away!"
> "There can be only one."
> "I'm the Kurgan. I'm the strongest."

Interests
Steel, Russian History, Motels, Queen, Decapitation, Driving like a maniac.